Follicle check report

Well, the report isn't exactly negative but I was hoping for something a bit more solid. I have 3 eggs that are vying for viability, and lot more that are never going to get there. Two eggs are 12mm and one is 13mm. For CD12, that is a bit small, but the Dr. has hope that by Tuesday, they will reach {or be closer to} viable size, which for those of you who don't know, is 17-22mm. When I was tracking ovulation, I would typically get a +OPK on CD15, indicating that I was going to ovulate within the next 24 hours. Following that pattern, it means I have a few more days for these little eggies to grow before ovulation time. Since I am taking the HCG shot, ovulation is guaranteed but I was hoping for more than just one viable egg...and there is still a chance that none of the eggs will reach maturity, which would be a very disappointing turn for this cycle.

So back to the doctor I go for another ultrasound on Tuesday morning, CD14. If they haven't grown, this cycle is done. However, they should grow 2-3mm a day, so by Tuesday, we're hoping for the 13mm egg to be 17+mm and it would be super nice if the 12mm eggs were also near that size. The Dr. said that with PCOS patients, it's always best to have more than one egg release, because PCOS eggs aren't always the best quality. I asked if it's possible to ovulate and release an immature egg and he said with PCOS that is actually a major problem...and quite possibly what is happening to me each month. :( Now that I'm getting ultrasounds, it'll be easier to track if that's the issue, but then what?? IVF most likely. Again, he said that many women with PCOS go the IVF route because 1) their eggs are tougher to penetrate, 2) ovulation issues are prevalent, and 3) egg maturity/medication response issues. But, not to get ahead of myself, we have 4 IUI's to go before we reach the end of our rope.

So why do I already feel defeated??